personal development, self help

What mentally strong people tend not to do!

mental toughness

Great Life Lesson About Mental Strength by Amy Morin

Mentally strong people tend not to do the following thirteen things! For those of us who own our own businesses or who are working their way up the corporate ladder, there are some lessons to be learned here!

1.    Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves. You don’t see mentally strong people feeling sorry for their circumstances or dwelling on the way they’ve been mistreated. They have learned to take responsibility for their actions and outcomes, and they have an inherent understanding of the fact that frequently life is not fair. They are able to emerge from trying circumstances with self-awareness and gratitude for the lessons learned. When a situation turns out badly, they respond with phrases such as “Oh, well.” Or perhaps simply, “Next!”

2. Give Away Their Power. Mentally strong people avoid giving others the power to make them feel inferior or bad. They understand they are in control of their actions and emotions. They know their strength is in their ability to manage the way they respond.

3.    Shy Away from Change. Mentally strong people embrace change and they welcome challenge. Their biggest “fear,” if they have one, is not of the unknown, but of becoming complacent and stagnant. An environment of change and even uncertainty can energize a mentally strong person and bring out their best.

4. Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control. Mentally strong people don’t complain (much) about bad traffic, lost luggage, or especially about other people, as they recognize that all of these factors are generally beyond their control. In a bad situation, they recognize that the one thing they can always control is their own response and attitude, and they use these attributes well.

5. Worry About Pleasing Others. Know any people pleasers? Or, conversely, people who go out of their way to dis-please others as a way of reinforcing an image of strength? Neither position is a good one. A mentally strong person strives to be kind and fair and to please others where appropriate, but is unafraid to speak up. They are able to withstand the possibility that someone will get upset and will navigate the situation, wherever possible, with grace.

It takes much practice to hone mental strength!

6. Fear Taking Calculated Risks. A mentally strong person is willing to take calculated risks. This is a different thing entirely than jumping headlong into foolish risks. But with mental strength, an individual can weigh the risks and benefits thoroughly, and will fully assess the potential downsides and even the worst-case scenarios before they take action.

7. Dwell on the Past. There is strength in acknowledging the past and especially in acknowledging the things learned from past experiences—but a mentally strong person is able to avoid miring their mental energy in past disappointments or in fantasies of the “glory days” gone by. They invest the majority of their energy in creating an optimal present and future.

8. Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over. We all know the definition of insanity, right? It’s when we take the same actions again and again while hoping for a different and better outcome than we’ve gotten before. A mentally strong person accepts full responsibility for past behavior and is willing to learn from mistakes. Research shows that the ability to be self-reflective in an accurate and productive way is one of the greatest strengths of spectacularly successful executives and entrepreneurs.

9. Resent Other People’s Success. It takes strength of character to feel genuine joy and excitement for other people’s success. Mentally strong people have this ability. They don’t become jealous or resentful when others succeed (although they may take close notes on what the individual did well). They are willing to work hard for their own chances at success, without relying on shortcuts.

10. Give Up After Failure. Every failure is a chance to improve. Even the greatest entrepreneurs are willing to admit that their early efforts invariably brought many failures. Mentally strong people are willing to fail again and again, if necessary, as long as the learning experience from every “failure” can bring them closer to their ultimate goals.

11. Fear Alone Time. Mentally strong people enjoy and even treasure the time they spend alone. They use their downtime to reflect, to plan, and to be productive. Most importantly, they don’t depend on others to shore up their happiness and moods. They can be happy with others, and they can also be happy alone.

12. Feel the World Owes Them Anything. Particularly in the current economy, executives and employees at every level are gaining the realization that the world does not owe them a salary, a benefits package and a comfortable life, regardless of their preparation and schooling. Mentally strong people enter the world prepared to work and succeed on their merits, at every stage of the game.

13. Expect Immediate Results. Whether it’s a workout plan, a nutritional regimen, or starting a business, mentally strong people are “in it for the long haul”. They know better than to expect immediate results. They apply their energy and time in measured doses and they celebrate each milestone and increment of success on the way. They have “staying power.” And they understand that genuine changes take time. Do you have mental strength? Are there elements on this list you need more of? With thanks to Amy Morin, I would like to reinforce my own abilities further in each of these areas today. How about you?

H/T Lifehack

For questions about title insurance or to compare the title bill for your New York residential or commercial real estate purchase or refinance please visit Hallmark Abstract Service at http://www.hallmarkabstractllc.com or send us an email at orders@hallmarkabstractllc.com.

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Pricing Strategy, Title Insurance New York

Guest Post: Pricing: The Never-Ending Sales Question

In business the question of pricing is always central to day to day operations in one form or another!

In the case of title insurance where premiums do not vary from one company to another there are other fees involved in the transaction that do. The business decision on how to price those fees is one way that Hallmark Abstract can differentiate ourselves from other firms.

In other industries where price can vary and perhaps bids have to be placed in order to win business this question of pricing will run central to the day-to-day decision making.

The following article was written by Adrian Miller who ‘is a Business Growth Architect, sales consultant, trainer, author, avid traveler blogger, columnist, hockey mom, amateur photographer, theater lover, movie goer and networker extraordinaire.

She launched her sales consulting business 26 years ago and since then has worked in pretty much every industry and with companies large and small.’

Pricing: The Never-Ending Sales Question

Effective pricing is a slippery slope. You fear that you are pricing too high and then the opposite, too low. Just like Little Red Riding Hood, we want it to be “just right” but it can often come out wrong.

  • Will I lose the business because of my fees?
  • What if they go with the competition because they charge less?
  • I’ve lowered my price so much I wonder if I’m going to be able to make any money at all?

These questions and others just like it cause us to wrack our brains each and every time that we write a proposal or submit a quote and have to include a price!

It shouldn’t be that difficult! Now, I’m not some pricing guru (and I am certain that there are some out there) but there are a few things that I’ve done over these 27 years that have stood me in good measure. Perhaps you will find them helpful too:

  1. I know my competition’s “rack rate” and although I don’t know how and if they discount their prices, knowing their base price is often enough to help me establish a project budget.
  2. I truly understand the scope of effort that my project will require. There is nothing worse than charging a discounted price and then discovering just how much time and work the project will entail. (Ya gotta ask QUESTIONS before giving a price!)
  3. I understand and believe in my value. (That’s a BIG one.)
  4. I’m not afraid to walk away from a project if the prospect is simply not willing to pay for it.
  5. I am open to negotiation on price but that doesn’t mean simply caving in on their demands. They give a little, I give a little and we all come to a happy agreement on what is fair.

It’s not easy, it requires stamina but you can get it right. The simple fact is that if you don’t, you run the risk of having an unprofitable company and working yourself to death for very little.

 

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Business, Title Insurance New York

Five keys to optimism in business!

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Five ways optimists think and act differently!

For anyone either in business for themselves or who works for someone else there are obviously many challenges that arise on a daily basis.

One of the keys, therefore, is to stay focused and maintain as optimistic and positive frame of mind as possible. Of course, as most of us are painfully aware, unfortunately at times that can be easier said than done!

As a guide, from the website Lifehack these are the ‘5 Things Optimists Do Differently’.

1. Optimists know that you don’t necessarily need to achieve something in order to be truly happy.

Happiness comes from within. It’s a conscious decision that you need to make, whether or not things are going the way you want them to.

If you provide a condition to your happiness, like you’ll only be happy if you’re able to achieve something, then what happens if that condition isn’t met?

Success isn’t a guaranteed factor. If you equate happiness with success, you may be happy, but this happiness stops the minute you start failing.

Give yourself the power to be committed to being happy by adapting a grateful outlook in life.

2. They avoid negative people and refrain from encountering bad vibes.

Optimists are well aware that being negative and being positive are both contagious. So, for them to create an optimistic environment, they stay away from grouchy people who always complain.

Instead, they nourish relationships with emotionally supportive and equally optimistic people. They know that life is too short to spend with people who don’t really value them, so they choose to spend it with people who do realize their worth.

3. Optimists respect themselves and their time.

In a way, optimistic people are like wild and brave souls–they are confident that they don’t need the approval of anyone else in order to live their lives. Positive people know that people will always judge them with whatever they do, so why bother pleasing people when it’s obvious that you can never please everyone every single time?

Optimists even have the courage and the confidence to say no to things that don’t really matter to them. They’re not pressured into doing something that they don’t really like, and they’re free to pursue their passion accordingly.

4. Optimists are resourceful people.

Successful entrepreneurs and optimists are both innovative and creative individuals. They know that they’re never going to have everything that they need, so they make do with what they have instead.

– Steve Jobs didn’t wallow in fear when he didn’t have enough money to fund his startup: he sold his only means of transportation, his VW Microbus, to finance it.

– Walt Disney didn’t go into severe depression when he was told that Mickey Mouse is a “giant mouse on the screen that would terrify women”; he pushed through and look at how famous and well-loved Mickey is today.

– Donald Trump was bankrupt four times (in 1991, 1992, 2004 and 2009) but his resourcefulness and innovation gave him a $2.7 billion net worth today.

5. They know that life is not fair–and they’re okay with that.

Most people feel grumpy, frustrated or disappointed because they expect life to be fair for everyone.

Why does Justin Bieber have a lot of haters? Because a lot of people don’t like the fact that he gets millions just by performing and doing his hair flips regularly.

Why are there a lot of complainers all over the world? Because they feel that they’re self-entitled to everything that their neighbors have.

Why are there crime scenes? Because people feel like they’re not given equal treatment (such as equal money with the rest of the society), they should just go ahead and make things equal. By taking the matter into their own hands, they commit crimes instead.

Optimists are not like these people. They know that life is never going to be easy–it’s never fair and it’s never predictable. In fact, they expect life to be unfair and unpredictable most of the time! They accept the fact that their friends may be given more money, that some celebrities are given more fame, and that some of their loved ones are more successful in terms of romance.

And you know what?

They’re okay with that.

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